fireflies and cottonwood

our wedding blog

Winter forecast ahead? December 11, 2008

Filed under: Uncategorized — girldogtorch @ 10:16 pm
Tags: ,

Okay, friends and family, hang on to your hats– we’ve been thinking, and there might be a change in plans.

I currently am applying to PhD programs…hopefully, and in best case scenario, we will stay here.  Same place, same lovely apartment, same jobs and group of wonderful friends.  But– I’m also applying, for example, at Notre Dame, at a school in DC, and at the University of Aberdeen.  Scotland.  Scotland!

Which is great, exciting, fabulous.  The more we think about it, though, the more we worry that this summer might hold a major (and expensive) move.  Our wedding savings is going well, but even traveling to St. Louis and staying there is a little extra expense, and moving could really stretch our budget.  What if we need to move, and then do the wedding long-distance from wherever _that_ place is?  It’s worrisome.

I tentatively floated the idea of: What if we pushed it back into the winter, not the summer, of next year?  We have mixed feelings.  We’re ready, eager, and excited.  But the unknown causes a lot of stress, and the idea of having it in the winter instead of the summer is a huge relief– it means that we can settle into a possibly new location, job/program, and abode, and settle down before the traveling to our wedding.  It means not worrying about having all the funds and savings we’d like to have for the wedding.  And it means resting and really looking forward to it.

We haven’t made any sure plans in that direction– I haven’t contacted the church or any of our vendors.  But in our minds– we’re leaning in that direction.

Potential complicating factors: we have another close family wedding in October–what if they’re very comfortable getting married after us?  Is it a terrible feeling to be going “first”?  I have several girlfriends having new babies or thinking about new babies– does this ruin their plans or create stress?  Will everyone be disappointed in us?

Of course, as my dad put it, “It’s _so_ hot in St. Louis in July.”  I can imagine a winter wedding with even more candles that I’d been planning before, and cozy cookies for favors (maybe Christmas ornaments for favors?), and greenery everywhere.  We could even go back to the original inspiration: my green ring, and not fear a red kilt and dark green color scheme.  And finally, if Lady Aisla Rose is toddling by winter 2009, wouldn’t she be the loveliest escort for a groomsman ever?

Any thoughts?  Reassurances?  Ideas?

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6 Responses to “Winter forecast ahead?”

  1. Jan Says:

    I think you do what you think is best. You probably don’t have to make a decision for a little while yet. It is a lot easier to cancel than it is to get everything going. I guess canceling decisions are based on when deposits are due or when deposits can be fully refunded. When will you hear from graduate programs? If you end up in Scotland you may want to just get married and have a big celebration rather than a big wedding with a reception. Breathe, the possibilities are endless and happiness will abound.

    • girldogtorch Says:

      Those are sweet thoughts– thank you. We wouldn’t hear back from schools until March or so… cutting it too close to July. You’re right– we don’t have to make a decision, and we’ll feel better after _seeing_ you all for Christmas– it’s a lovely thing to get to have a reception with all of our loved ones, and we will be so happy, giddy, and thankful wherever it is.

  2. Amanda Says:

    Scotland? I’ll be so jealous if you get married in Scotland. After we got engaged I had a wedding in Ireland planned within the half hour. I mean vendors, venues, it all was picked out. I was, obviously, vetoed.

    We, maybe that was more me than Chris, spent a lot of time trying to decide where would be a good location. I think it simply comes down to your priorities–attendance, location, time of year. For me, it was all about location and the backdrop. For Chris, attendance was important. He had a list of people he absolutely wanted to attend, and therefore wanted a wedding that would be affordable to the guests. So we found a compromise. Once you have your top three can’t-live-without things picked out, everything else will fall into place.

    • girldogtorch Says:

      Oh, no, we wouldn’t get married in Scotland. It would always be in St. Louis. But a summer move there would make having a wedding going on in the summer tricky. I think you also have to have lived in Scotland or Ireland for one or even two years before marrying there.. they have some strict rules. But, no–it’s a St. Louis wedding.

  3. Amanda Says:

    Sorry, I completely misunderstood your post. I’m sure whenever you decide to get married it will work out beautifully. I’ve known several people who have gotten married over their Christmas break from school. There are a lot of things you can do with it. As a bride, I think it would be fun. As a guest, it has always added stress to an already stressful December. Maybe a January wedding would be a good compromise. Regardless, it’s your wedding. Do what you want to do. It’ll be sensational.

    Especially don’t worry about our wedding and the order. Chris and I’ll be there as long as it’s not the same weekend as ours. As the youngest grandchild on both sides of my family, I’ve known for quite some time that I would never be “first”.

  4. Lynette Says:

    We’ll be there whenever. It’s ultimately YOUR day, and Jan said it best: “Happiness will abound.” And I’m all about the cozy factor.


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