Illumination October 25, 2008

 

One of our plans for our centerpieces (non-floral) is to make luminaries.  

Currently, the wonderful Jane Winter (at Wildflowers) had amazing ideas for a lush, romantic, old-fashioned floral arrangement for the table at the entry-way of the reception room (upon which might be, for example, the table numbers), and she and I are thinking that we might also use old, antique books in that tablescape.  Perhaps with old pewter containers for the flowers?  But I digress…

Books are a theme for our decorating as well.  I’m imagining tablescapes for each table, with old books, stacked at different levels, and our luminaries.  Plus hundreds of small candles, all over the room.  (My mom and her best girl friend have already begun snatching up unscented white candles at dollar stores and sales.)  

I think candlelight is so, so beautiful and memorable.  

Inspiration images of candle-lit weddings:

(Boards from Style Me Pretty)

 

And besides the tiny candles, here is our idea for making our own luminaries: 

We will use tin cans of various sizes, from soup cans, to large crushed tomato sized, to coffee can sized, and larger.  My idea is to punch holes into them in either random patterns, or in lace-like patterns.  Matt would like to paint each can with a simple landscape scene (sky, ground, a few quick trees), and then the lighted holes would be like fireflies.  

Lots of people have asked me how I’ll make the luminaries: you fill the clean, empty cans with water, and freeze them.  Then, when you tap a nail with a hammer into the can, you punch a small hole, but the solid ice keeps the can from denting.  Very, very simple.  You can use pre-printed patterns to create a lacy effect, or for a pattern.  And–at the end of the reception, if people would like to take one or two home, of course they may.  Otherwise, we just recycle the cans–they were free and plentiful, and we would have recycled them anyway.

Here are some images of tin can luminaries:

(I don’t like just one image, as opposed to many small pinpricks of light, but this shows the powerful effect one “cantern” can have.)

 

Finally, I don’t think this knitted candle-cover goes with our general aesthetic, but I just love this idea so much, and think it’s so simple and beautiful, I can’t help but include it:

I can’t wait to see the faces of all our loved ones surrounding our tables and lit by so many beautiful little lanterns.

More location photos September 21, 2008

While last in St. Louis, I had the opportunity to take lots of photos of both Emmanuel and the Tap Room. Now, I can officially begin making decisions about decorations!  Flowers along the aisle?  Emmanuel has a very, very long nave, and is dark, with dark wood and green carpet.  One idea would be to have flowers or greenery with ribbon along some of the pews, but there are so many pews!  The only other place we are allowed to put flowers is up on the altar, in the official altar guild vases.  But maybe with a bride, groom, 16 attendants, a ring bearer and a flower girl, there will be enough human decoration.

I didn’t have time to take interior shots at church, but took one from my friend Jodie’s blog from her wedding (she is an _incredible_ photographer, by the way.)

(So exciting to see Emmanuel during a wedding!)

Exterior of Emmanuel:

The outside of the front door.  To the right is Jones Lawn, which is really quite large and filled with huge shade trees.  We are thinking of having lemonade and sparkling water on the lawn, directly after the ceremony and receiving line.  We could have a clown making balloon animals for the children, and maybe some live music…  While the bridal party and families are being photographed, people can mingle, have something to drink, and relax a bit before the reception.  This could also prevent a long lag at the reception, while people wait for the bridal party to arrive.

This is the memorial garden, to the left of the main entrance.  There is also a side entrance to the Chapel here, and up along the path on the left is the door into the parish hall.

(The church was built by a family from “back East,” and Mrs. Lockwood used memories and sketches of her own home church to influence the architects.  The cross on the steeple is exactly the height of the little Lockwood girl when it was built.)

The Tap Room–I love, love, love the hardwood floors, exposed bricks, tall windows, views of the city–I can’t wait to dance the night away with my love and everyone we love.

The first thing to consider: head tables.  Do we have our spouses and dates of our attendants at the head tables with them?  My first instinct is to say yes, because it seems odd to have people separated just because that’s the way it’s usually done.  I would never do that at a dinner party.  But we have 16 people. Maybe two head tables, at opposite ends or something?

Matt and I are thinking doing a writer as a theme for each table.  So instead of “Table 5,” you might have “the Whitman table.”  I’m thinking of doing tablescapes of old books and many, many candles as centerpieces at each table.

The bar.  They also have tiny white lights strung all around the wooden pillars and windows.

The outside patio for the upper room where our reception will be held.  I suppose people can mingle out here as well.  Candles out here, as well.

Wedding hits and flops September 18, 2008

The fabulous Indiebride has a message board called Kvetch, where women and some men can share ideas and give advice on countless topics.  In the thread “Suggestion Box,” one popular thread is called, “What was a hit? What was a flop?”  Genius.

After their weddings, brides will come back to the forum and report what went well at their wedding, and what (often surprisingly) did not.  For example, often brides will report that no one had heard their vows, and they wished they had used microphones.  Or they will be surprised that no one used the guestbook.  Obviously, for anyone planning a wedding, this is a goldmine of ideas, things to consider, and advice.  Here’s an example:

“I’ve been to about a million weddings and here are some memorable hits and flops from those I’ve been to:

HITS
–Assigned seating. Especially when I don’t know many people, I hate the awkward hunt for seats. This is especially true if they haven’t given me a plus one and I’m there alone. 

–Something to drink as guests were coming in before the ceremony. I’ve had lemonade and cocktails and both were nice. 

–Doing something unexpected. Favorites: groom’s cake in shape of beer stein (he was of German heritage); bagpipes; homemade strawberry jam from bride’s dad as favors; unusual readings.

–A heartfelt thank-you toast by the couple. More meaningful than any favor.

–Couples who memorize or at least write on cards the main part of their vows so the officiant’s prompting isn’t breaking up the flow every three words.

FLOPS
–Failures of coordination on timing issues. A) last of guests still standing in line at buffet when cake cutting started; B) caterers still setting up when guests began arriving; C) long lag times between ceremony and reception at a location where many guests had driven and had nothing to do in between; D) waiting around forever (going on two hours) at cocktails waiting for pictures to be done.

–Not enough quantity of passed appetizers, so guests are stalking waiters coming out near the kitchen doors.

–Bride and groom not making it around to speak with everyone personally. At one wedding, I left without ever meeting the groom. I get he was busy, but how about a two minute, “Oh, I’ve heard so much about you, thanks for coming”?

–Bride and groom leaving too early. Why leave at 9:30 when your band keeps playing til 11? The party is over when the couple leaves, so it feels kind of lame after they’re gone. After I got all dressed up and traveled for these events, I was disappointed that things ended so soon.

–Music too loud during dinner.”

I think the best thing about the thread is that while I personally might get caught up in the things _I’m_ most interested in (readings, colors, food, ceremony) it might not naturally occur to me to think about things like timing, sound, flow of food…  It’s so helpful!  So, on that note: what are some hits and flops you’ve seen at weddings, including your own?  Or, things you wish a bride and groom would consider for guests?  Please advise.

Location, location, location August 18, 2008

After much thought and discussion, we’ve decided on having the ceremony at Emmanuel Episcopal Church, in Webster Groves.  This is my church, and has been for nearly ten years.  Matt also loves his church–right up the street–and we first struggled to visualize our wedding in both spaces, and to try to articulate what they meant to us.

 

 

 

The Episcopal service goes by the Book of Common prayer.  I have been worshiping with this liturgy since I was seventeen.  One of the wonderful things about it is its constancy: I can go to an Episcopal or Anglican church anywhere in the world, and immediately fall into the familiar liturgy and cadences of the prayers and patterns I recognize.  Once, I was in a church in Prague–I knew none of the words, but followed along in my own way.  Suddenly, during Communion, the liturgy was sung in the exact same tune as the tune used for Communion when I was a freshman at University of Illinois.  I hadn’t heard it in years, but it suddenly came rushing back to me–a flood of familiarity in the most of foreign of places.

 

Emmanuel in particular is a huge part of my life.  My college is across the street, and I walked across the church lawn countless times, on my way to class.  I sang in the choir, and rehearsed every Wednesday night with years.  I taught Sunday school, and then was head of Parish Family Life–planning parish-wide events throughout the year.  In the year before I left for New York, I trained new acolytes.  It gives me joy and pride to imagine that some of the kids I trained will get to by acolytes at my own wedding.  Finally, some of my most dearly beloved friends are there.  That church community has supported me in so many ways, and I grew as a person and came into myself there.  I still miss it, many a Sunday.

 

When we were just beginning to date, Matt came to Emmanuel to hear me sing.  I was the cantor for a small, formal evening service: Evensong.  I was the cantor, accompanied by the organ.  I was very nervous: all of my roommates, as well as my dad and another colleague, had come to see the service and hear me, but I was most nervous because it was the first time Matt would hear me sing.  In fact, afterwards, I wouldn’t let him say anything at all about the service, and could barely look at him.

 

As for the reception, it was relatively simple to choose the Tap Room, or Schlafly Brewery.  Again, we have many, many good memories there.  I often went there with my family, including my Grammy and my late Grandpa Hughes, and my dad loved to go there with me.  I remember at least one Thanksgiving there with my dad and sister.  Matt and all our community of friends went there often, and we have one hilarious story from our courtship that took place there (again, I was deeply embarrassed, and pacing outside with my roommates trying to discern whether Matt could tell if I liked him…while Matt cooly played pool and controlled the jukebox…)

Also, the food is great.  So is the bar.  And the upstairs room is lovely, and very St. Louis.  I was tempted to have an outdoor reception, but once we moved it to summer, we wanted it inside, so people could dance and make merry comfortably.

 

 

 

 

 

We’ll post menu options from the Tap Room later, but hopefully, we’ll get to share some meals there with family friends before the end of the year…and decide in person which options are most delicious.

the contenders May 7, 2008

Miss Aimee B’s

 

the Club Room at the Schlafly Brewery

 

the Main Dining Room at the Bevo Mill

 (photos all from respective websites)

July 11th, 2009? May 7, 2008

Well.  April 11th, 2009, was looking like the perfect date.  It falls before Matt’s Spring Break, and he has the Thursday and Friday immediately preceding the 11th off, too.  But as I was figuring dates and fees with venues this afternoon, something in my mind said, “Hmm.  When is Easter 2009?”  Turns out, it’s that weekend. 

Matt doesn’t get out of school until the last week in June (this year and next), and the first week in July is July 4th weekend.  Which I wouldn’t necessarily mind (sparklers!), but travel would be so much more expensive.  So we’re considering the next week, which is July 11th.  Any thoughts? 

Also, we’re starting to get the reception venue ironed out.  It’s still between the Tea House, the Tap Room, and the Bevo Mill; I have precise price quotes from all three, and we’ve compared menus.  It may still come down to affordability, but all three are nice in various ways.  I have to say, though, that the Tea House ladies are the sweetest ever.  The snail mailed me actual photographs of the rose arbor and the tent, so I could see if for myself and “carry the photos around in my purse,” to share with my girlfriends.  How sweet is that?  And everyone is very accommodating about helping us figure out the veggie entree option, so it’s been fun, and the only stress was last week when I suddenly felt pressured to commit. 

So all is going well.  If this date becomes us, as it were, then I think we can settle on a venue.  And then a photographer.  And pretty soon, we should have engagement photos to share.